The Tasker
(Based on a true story.)
I completed many tasks today
But sometimes I wonder
If I’m a tasktaker and not a live-r
Not like liver. Ew.
I mean take a look.
At a few moments ago..
I came home
And thought
I was finally going to give myself
A chance to eat
But no
I set my food down
And go to the restroom
And realize I just used my last roll
And would need to restock…
Fine, I said. I’ll do it later.
I sit down again
I set my shoes down
Great! Time to chow.
Not.
I think the sneakers are tracking dirt.
I should put them away..
I go to my room.
My sneakers had been tracking dirt!
It’s on the rug!
I can’t leave it like that…
I get my vacuum.
Perfect, rug clean.
Time to eat.
Wrong!
If you already vacuumed…
You might as well restock the TP.
Off I go.
Well, if the bathroom trash is full,
You might as well..
Fast forward
It must be time to eat now, right?
RIGHT?
Wrong. A. Gain.
I thought of this poem.
And decided to starve myself
From not only food
But from rest
To hopefully commiserate with someone
Just as deranged as me
Or
Make you laugh.
Choose your poison
I need to finally ingest mine.

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